Holiday Fancy!

Each year, I love getting the girls dressed in their Christmas dresses and taking their picture in front of the tree the Sunday before Christmas. The images are never "canvas-worthy", but still so special to me. This year, we didn't get Bella's dress until last week so this was the first time she got to wear it. Oh well, hers could be worn all winter... Don't they look adorable?

Prayers for Bella...

I have struggled with whether or not to post this on a blog, but I think it is best to do so. Someday, when my girls read this, I want them to know I am real. :)

So many of you know something is going on and/or have seen me upset over the past few days, and I just want to first of all state that this is probably going to come across worse than it really is. Please don't panic!

Isabella has always been a very difficult child. Funny, but difficult. Day to day activities are a struggle for us because she throws a lot of fits and screams and yells...even seems not to understand a lot of what we say. For a year or two now we have just thought that is just Bella, but we now believe that something is not right with her. In fact, it has been eating at me for about the past 6 months or so.

Things started clicking a month or so ago when we started getting calls DAILY from the daycare saying Bella was in the office for running out of the room, hitting, whatever.... At that point we asked for a speech screening to see if communication was a factor...

Now,in a previous post I mentioned that she would need a full speech evaluation because of her voice and her failed speech screening that was given to her through the daycare/school distrct. That evaluation was this week. In preparation for it, I have been talking with our Ocupational Therapist at school (whom has become a good friend of mine) and over the past few weeks, I have realized that Bella has some sensory issues. We have talked for hours and she has laughed at me saying everything I am telling her about Belle I should be wriitng down for the evaluation. So I did.

My MIL and BIL were here last weekend and Lee and I were talking about Belle. She told me that she really thought Belle didn't understand what I was saying, and she wasn't just pushing my buttons all of the time. (Good news, and bad news...) I cried just thinking about it because it was like ALL ALONG I knew there was something not right. Don't you think mothers always know?

Well, at the evaluation this past Thursday, Bella did not pass her language test (her receptive language was fine, her expressive was not. That means her vocabulary and ability to SAY what she wants to say are not normal). She did fine on her hearing test, but would not cooperate for the vision screening (which they wondered if it went back to the language thing...), and her articulation scores were 2 points from failing as well. No problem. Speech therapy I can handle. But before they can say for sure if she needs it, we need to go back in January for a second battery of tests.

So I brought up the sensory issues I had been documenting. The physchologist wrote down significant things I told her and agreed many of them were classic, she told me that at Bella's age her issues need to be VERY severe for school-based therapy. I know she is not in that category so I read through the lines that therapy from the school district is not an option at this point.

On Friday, I told our OT how the meeting went and I talked to her...and so many other people in the Special Education field trying to get an opinion on what now... She isn't severe enough for her level of OT, but (as she told me) 30 minutes twice a week doesn't FIX anything. It is a daily regiment we will need to become accustomed to AT HOME that will help her (and us) cope with this. Sensory disorders are nothing that she will grow out of, but something we will need to deal with. Lovely.

So yesterday I just fell apart. I literally cried all day. I kept thinking why is this just hitting me now? But I guess because school is over and the studio is closed for the holidays, it is just now sinking in. The level of care this is going to endure (for a real sensory diet) absolutely overwhelms me. I don't know where to start. I know our insurance won't cover a sensory gym (which is what she would need...private therapy) except maybe 20 visits a year (after our deductible), but even then the home care.......

Brian told me yesterday that God will provide and take care of us. I was mad at him for throwing a cliche' at me instead of helping me come up with a solution (sounds just like me, huh?) But today in church, the sermon was about hope for the season and every slide had the word Hope on it (Belle's middle name), and when the praise team led "God will make a way" I lost it again. Why do I seem to think I must do it all...and alone?

In the meantime, we have started teaching Bella a few coping techniques. She now has started asking for "sumpin to chew!" when she is upset and it really is beginning to work. We have purhcased several teething rings and gum to keep all over the cars and in the house.

I don't want you to think that she SEEMS that different than regular kids, because she doesn't. She is just VERY high strung and gets over-stimulated VERY easy (which makes her go crazy). But she is still my sweet little preschooler that is stinkin' HILARIOUS! I love that little kid!

So, I just ask you all to please pray for Bella...and us. We are trying to get our hands on a few things that I know we should need, a weighted blanket, surgical brush for the 'brushing' (did you know it is recommended we do that every 90 minutes to start with???? Oh MY!) We have her some bouncy things and this is just the tip of the iceburg, I know. I have a sweet friend that has a son with this same thing (and if you are reading this, please call me!!! I SO need to talk to someone who knows what this stuff even IS!! My mom looks at me like I am crazy! Ha!). But I will do anything I have to to make our lives as close to normal as I can. Just to be able to get through normal day to day things (like brushing her hair, or riding in a car) would be great! But I do have to say, this explains SO much of her behaviors...

We don't need anything right now, just your thoughts and prayers. If you have any insights on this kind of thing, I'd love to hear it! I have had books recommended to me that I plan on getting my hands on soon. But any level of support would be appreciated.

Our Newest Christmas Tradition

Tonight we came up with a tradition that I think will be an annual favorite! We always drive around and look at Christmas lights, but tonight we added a little (or a lot) of fun to it. First we grabbed all of our Christmas CDs, stopped off at Fresh Market for some goodies and started hunting for 'the best' light display in town. I told the kids we'd take a picture of any house that made us STOP the car to look at it, then pick a favorite at the end of the night. We were out a couple of hours and it was so much fun. We listened to a variety of music (some traditional instrumental pieces, some good 'ole family favorites, and even some hip-hop tunes!).

I just had to share what we found. Several houses looked nice (although it was hard to even FIND houses with many lights again this year)...




...and then we found THIS little thing. I remembered it from last year once I saw it. We literally had to stop the car in the parking lot across the street and GET OUT of the car. Can you BELIEVE this house? Oh MY!!! It obviously won the prize for the night!



Olivia said it was the best night of her life. I can't wait to do it again next year!

ETA: We also found two other houses a few nights later. The first one is one we pass by all of the time (the Land Here Santa cracks us up!), and tonight we noticed they had the lights synchronized with music. I love that! Now, this last one ties for first place, we've decided. Just LOOK at this place! We saw it in the newspaper and had to drive by! There is no way we could see it all by just driving by. Can you imagine their electric bill?

Bella's raspy voice

We went to Children's Hospital this past Monday...not because of any emergency (thank goodness!), but to take Bella to an ENT. It was suggested to us that we take her to see if her rhaspy voice was being caused by nodules.

So...we took her and the doctor wanted to scope her throat. We had been warned that would probably happen so WE were prepared. Bella, on the other hand, was NOT. She didn't like the doctor to check her ears and even asked the nurse "Where did that boy go?" when he stepped out of the room.

Well, the actual scoping was pretty cool (other than the fact that my baby was screaming). The doctor showed us right then where the nodules were on her vocal cords and how they couldn't close because of them (they are like caluses). He said she also had reflux (news to us!), and that more than likely when she was a baby the reflux made her throat uncomfortable so she compensated by using her voice inappropriately--hence the rhaspy voice that I have come to love so much.

An hour and a half later, we left the hospital with a prescription for Zantac, a bunch of stickers, a stuffed puppy and a lollipop. We will need to get her voice therapy to teach her to use her voice appropriately. Looks like I need to get out my video camera to start recording as much of that sweet voice as I can now...before it is gone.

Oh, Christmas Tree; Oh Christmas Tree...How stressful you can BE!

A few weeks ago, I went to a ladies' event at church focused on making the holidays less-stressed and more fun. One of the things that was mentioned was letting the children be more involved with the festivities...for example, decorating the Christmas tree. I had always taken that task for myself because...well...I can be a little OCD about how it looks in the end. But this year, I decided to go with the flow--I let the girls decorate it how they see fit (and turn my head when the ornaments get put on the same 3 branches...).

My first order of business was to get 2 hat boxes to put each girls' ornaments in... That way, they can be in charge each year of putting up, and taking down their own ornaments. I will be in charge of any extra-special ones I don't want broken, but for the most part, they will be THEIR ornaments to take care of. I found some fun, funky pink and green boxes at Hobby Lobby and started sorting ornaments. The girls were so excited to have their own set (even though Liv had a TON more than Bella did since she's had more Christmases than her sister...).

I also bought a pre-lit, hinged tree. Before, it would take us over an hour to assemble our old tree and another 1-2 hours to put up lights. This year, it literally took 15 minutes!! Ya-Hoo!!!

Then the girls put up the ornaments. And just like I figured, Bella put all her ornaments on the same 3 branches...and I loved it! I remembered when the lady that spoke at the luncheon said to cherish when the ornaments are all at the bottom of the tree--because when the little ones grow up, it won't look the same... Since I have been having a hard time with Bella getting older it is a great way to cherish (and remember) the little hands that decorated my tree this year.




Then, in her mother's ways, Olivia asked if she could spread Bella's ornaments out... LOL! I told her "No Way! We are leaving them right where you both put them!"

One more tradition we have is for the girls to one ornament that represents their year. This year, of course, it is DANCE, DANCE, DANCE! Bella's is a little ballerina since she started dance this year, and Livie's is a dancer with pink and white since they won National's this year. I still need to get Bella a 'Hope' ornament though. Each year her ornament usually is one that says "Hope" somewhere on it (because of her middle name) and I want her to have a tree of Hope some day when she grows up... Maybe Liv will have a tree of dance. Literally, over half of her box was full of dance ornaments already!

A Lost Art

A few weeks ago we attended a birthday party for one of the girls' neighborhood friends at a skating rink. I was thrilled when they said that even the adults were to skate! I LOVE roller skating (even though I haven't been in a skating rink in over 10 years!)

Well, we all got in our skates...even Bella (we had the tiny skates' wheels tightened so they wouldn't roll very fast) and went out on the floor. I was pretty bummed the disco ball wasn't going, and no one would come do the hokey pokey with me in the center of the floor...(yes, I am a child of the 80's) but other than that, it was SO much fun!




And then I got to thinking about how lively skating rinks used to be. Don't you remember the carpeted walls, pin ball machines, nasty bathrooms with tile floors and metal plates for mirrors, the round mushroom-looking benches and the concession stands with pickles!?! I even went to a birthday party once and they were showing music videos on the wall (literally, the entire wall was the video--at the time, it was awesome!) And should I mention the video they were playing was 'Thriller'? LOL. At that party they also had these triangular schooters that had handlebars you would put your feet on and move them side to side to propell yourself. Then they had ramps in the corners...oh MY what fun!

Luckily, Liv had a great time too and is thinking about a skating party for her next birthday. Maybe I'll get to skate again... (if so, I'll bring my REAL camera. These were taken with my iPhone so they aren't the greatest...)

One more thing about 3...

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention... Since Bella's birthday was on a Monday this year, she got to see everyone at dance and tell them it was her birthday. Well...Mrs. Karen and Mrs. Julie changed the song "...this is my right hand..." to "...this is my right birthday hand...this is my left birthday hand..." just for her! It was so cute! Then, instead of the usual star she gets on her hand for doing a good job, they made her a birthday cake with 3 candles. How special she felt!!

The Big Three!

I couldn't decide what I was going to do for Bella's birthday party this year. I really wanted to have a big gymnastics party, but when I called to schedule it, they didn't have her date available due to a gymnastics meet.... So, I decided we'd keep it small at the house with just family, have dinner and make smores outside. (Why spend more when I don't have too, huh?)

Well, a few days before her birthday, my dad said he'd like to come out for the party. Cool! So, we continued with our 'family' party until the weather got cold (and bad). The day of the party, Brian and I discussed our options and decided it would be fun to take everyone to Playtime Pizza. They had a walk-in party package that gave us food, play cards for everyone and one 'big' attraction (like lazer tag, go-karts, etc...). We called everyone and made the switch hours before it was to begin.

So at 4:00, we got to Playtime Pizza. It was so loud and crazy in there! Wow! But it was really neat. The food was pretty decent and there was so much to do! We got 10 of the $10 playcards so we all got to do all kinds of games. Brian, Liv, Belle, and my dad (now, affectionately called "Dude-Dad" by Belle) went to do the go-karts. They all had a great time. I was saving my 'attraction' fee for lazer tag. Emily, Justin, and I went to sign up for a time. I had never done that before, and was afraid I wouldn't like it since I don't like anyone to chase me (ever)...but I absolutely LOVED it!!













Bella opened her gifts and got some great things! Some of them were a parachute, ball hopper, dance-camera, princess pillow, ABC learning desk, umbrella, boots, etc... So much fun!





Then, Brian and I took the girls on the bumper cars. We were trying to use up all the passes (although I don't think we actually did...). Olivia was barely tall enough to ride alone, and Bella rode with me. She did not enjoy it at all. She cried when people bumped into us (not to mention, everytime someone did, she bumped her mouth on the bar!) I kept us away from the others and she was ready to get out (and go home...) when we were done. It was late and the babies were tired. But all in all, a good party!



And best of all...my house stayed clean. No mess there at all! Yeah!

Happy Halloween!

We had a fun Halloween this past weekend! Bella got to wear her costume to school for their little party. Then we came home and got Livie dressed in her cheerleading costume and went to eat. We met the Bewley family at the new Larry's Pizza (YUM!), and headed out to the Fall Festival at our church. My mom also met us there and the children had a great time. There were a lot of blown up-bouncy things and even a climbing wall for the older kids. Emily and Justin came with Cooper after a little while. The weather was perfect...and we all had a good time.

Then, we came home to trick-or-treat in our neighborhood a little before bedtime. I was not feeling very good (allergies/sinus 'stuff') so I was ready to get home and in bed! But it was a great night. Not much candy to speak of (yea!)and sleepy kids. What could be better? Ha!



Olivia was able to do all of the jumpy-things. Bella tried, but she was so little, she couldn't get up the climbing parts to go down the slides...even with help.


Bella loved the toddler-jumpy thing with balls inside it. I couldn't keep her out of it! But I did talk her into playing a few games...



Can you believe it? We actually got one shot of all the grandkids! That NEVER happens!


Happy Boy, Cooper as Handy Manny.


Brian took Liv around to do the 'big kid' stuff so I didn't see them most of the evening. I stayed with Belle and the rest of the family.


Bella LOVES her Uncle JJ!


We ran into the Schnaitman's while we were there!


Cooper got scared by loud noises a few times. He really did have fun. I just thought this was an adorable 'pitiful' face from him. :)


Liv waited in line to climb the wall again this year. Bella stood watching at the fence. It was so cute.